MILisms

>This is what I started to write in 2004 so just copied onto this post.

Where to start?

I had met Estella (aka Stella – Mil) a few times before moving to Albuquerque and I have to admit there either weren’t any red flags or I was just too horny for Kal to see them. The first thing I thought was rather odd was when I flew down for the weekend and we were going to go to Santa Fe. We were about ready to leave when Stella said we couldn’t go until we took her to Costco. She proceeded to stock up on her things and then expected Kal, to pay for everything. I thought this was very odd to me as my mom would always pay for her own things and usually offer to buy things for me.

Anyway, I moved here and don’t regret doing so but it has been a real challenge with Stella. She has become more and more nasty and mean and right now I really do not want to have anything to do with her but she won't and I guess can't go away. I have listed a few ditties to highlight just what kind of a person she really is.

Red Flags – too late.

Efren Sr. had heart surgery a few months before I moved and on the second night I was here the phone rang in the middle of the night. We think something has happened to his dad so we were a little panicked. The conversation I hear from Kal is something like this. “He’s in the hospital! What happened? What hospital?” Then it gets weird. “She’s in jail? What happened? What jail?’’ Stella got in an argument with her neighbors and threatened to assault their 14 year old boy. Neighbors call police, dad has heart palpations and Mil gets hauled off to jail. I’m thinking to myself right now, this isn’t normal to bail out your mother in law from jail. Years later when we talk about this is "well I never was charged." What part of that statement makes no sense whatsoever?

Holidays and other special occasions.

My first Thanksgiving here and I wanted to make it special for my new family. I worked for days buying the food, preparing the dishes and set the table with my great grandmother’s china and my mom’s crystal. A friend, Patty came from Denver and helped with the cooking and made special napkin rings and a beautiful centerpiece. After showing up one hour late Mil headed straight for the wine. We had a delicious dinner and went into the living room for coffee after. I was hoping for some sort of acknowledgment of thanks from Stella but nothing came out of her mouth. So in my search for compliments asked her what she thought of the dinner. The response was, “It was ok.”

Next month at Christmas, I tried it again with a prime rib dinner on Christmas Eve and a Christmas day brunch. Her sons lavished their parents with gifts and when the last present was opened I noticed Stella didn’t purchase one present or even a card for her husband or her sons.

In the three Christmas’ I have been here, there was only one time she bought a present for her son. He is 6 feet tall and about 200 pounds and she bought him a size “medium” sweater. She said she would take it back to the store which she did, but only to get credit on her card for it, not to exchange the sweater.

Last Christmas, once again, my spouse bought her many lovely presents to her none. This year though, not only did she take everything back to the store, she had her son drive her. Then she wanted the stores to put the items value on her credit card.

For her 50^th wedding anniversary, we threw her a dinner party with a few (of the remaining) friends she had at our house. I told her to come an hour before the party knowing she is always late but this time they came right on time. As usual, once she got here she proceeded right to the wine and as the night wore on got more and more drunk. She couldn’t say good bye to any of the guests because she went into the bathroom and threw up on herself.

On Mother’s Day we had Francine's mother and sister over for a brunch and as usual MIL was two hours late and came in a fowl mood. She expected her son’s to dish her plate, pour her some wine (again) then she proceeded to speak Spanish the entire time even though she speaks perfect English. Only her son’s could understand her and even at their pleading she wouldn’t quit.

Other fun (?) times

She tells, (doesn’t ask) us, to take her husband to the eye doctor which we do because he is nice and we like him. He informs us he hasn’t eaten all day, which we find is the rule rather then the exception so we take him to a restaurant for a bite to eat. She is running late for an appointment (is there a pattern here?) and we see her come storming into the restaurant with a crazed look on her face. Kal takes her gently by the arm to tell her what the eye doctor told him. She whirled around and screamed at the top of her lungs, “You’re hurting me. Take your hands off me.” Of course everyone in the restaurant has turned around and is looking at this. The manager came up and asked if everything was alright or if he needed to call the police. To that, she screamed once again to call the police and have them arrest her son. She then takes her husband’s cane and throws it at him and barks to him to get up and go with her. In the meantime I am going to the kitchen to ask them to make dad’s order to go.