A while back there was a thing in Facebook where people posted 25 random things about themselves. Here is my list.
25 Random Things
1. I haven’t gone downhill skiing in years.
2. I listen to too much political radio on both sides and yell at my radio when Sean Hannity is on the air.
3. My sister can be a nut job.
4. I really love my home and neighborhood.
5. I don’t know if I will ever like Kal’s mom.
6. I want to start riding my bike more this spring and drop some pounds.
7. I thank God I found the church that I did.
8. I have four anniversaries 01-01-01 the day we met, 06-07-01 the day we moved in together, 03-02-04 our first marriage in San Francisco (null and void) and 09-17-08 our second marriage in San Francisco (still valid).
9. Summer is my favorite season and winter is my least favorite.
10. I still really miss my parents and realize I always will.
11. Sometimes I wish we could live on an island but would have to have plumbing and electricity.
12. I really love my Westies.
13. I really don’t miss Colorado I have so many friends in Albuquerque.
14. I wish Star Trek was never developed so Kal wouldn’t have the need to go to their conventions.
15. I am too controlling.
16. Why don’t places like to hire people who are in their 50s?
17. There is dysfunction in every family, some more then others.
18. I wish I could swim in the ocean on my private island every day.
19. Cooking is one of my favorite things to do.
20. Eating (sadly) is probably my second favorite thing to do.
21. Only a handful of people know exactly where and how Kal and I met.
22. Avitar was one of my favorite movies.
23. I worry too much.
24. I wonder why I can’t find any of my fraternity brothers on Facebook.
25. I’m a good person.
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
MILisms
>This is what I started to write in 2004 so just copied onto this post.
Where to start?
I had met Estella (aka Stella – Mil) a few times before moving to
Anyway, I moved here and don’t regret doing so but it has been a real challenge with Stella. She has become more and more nasty and mean and right now I really do not want to have anything to do with her but she won't and I guess can't go away. I have listed a few ditties to highlight just what kind of a person she really is.
Red Flags – too late.
Efren Sr. had heart surgery a few months before I moved and on the second night I was here the phone rang in the middle of the night. We think something has happened to his dad so we were a little panicked. The conversation I hear from Kal is something like this. “He’s in the hospital! What happened? What hospital?” Then it gets weird. “She’s in jail? What happened? What jail?’’ Stella got in an argument with her neighbors and threatened to assault their 14 year old boy. Neighbors call police, dad has heart palpations and Mil gets hauled off to jail. I’m thinking to myself right now, this isn’t normal to bail out your mother in law from jail. Years later when we talk about this is "well I never was charged." What part of that statement makes no sense whatsoever?
Holidays and other special occasions.
My first Thanksgiving here and I wanted to make it special for my new family. I worked for days buying the food, preparing the dishes and set the table with my great grandmother’s china and my mom’s crystal. A friend, Patty came from
Next month at Christmas, I tried it again with a prime rib dinner on Christmas Eve and a Christmas day brunch. Her sons lavished their parents with gifts and when the last present was opened I noticed Stella didn’t purchase one present or even a card for her husband or her sons.
In the three Christmas’ I have been here, there was only one time she bought a present for her son. He is 6 feet tall and about 200 pounds and she bought him a size “medium” sweater. She said she would take it back to the store which she did, but only to get credit on her card for it, not to exchange the sweater.
Last Christmas, once again, my spouse bought her many lovely presents to her none. This year though, not only did she take everything back to the store, she had her son drive her. Then she wanted the stores to put the items value on her credit card.
For her 50th wedding anniversary, we threw her a dinner party with a few (of the remaining) friends she had at our house. I told her to come an hour before the party knowing she is always late but this time they came right on time. As usual, once she got here she proceeded right to the wine and as the night wore on got more and more drunk. She couldn’t say good bye to any of the guests because she went into the bathroom and threw up on herself.
On Mother’s Day we had Francine's mother and sister over for a brunch and as usual MIL was two hours late and came in a fowl mood. She expected her son’s to dish her plate, pour her some wine (again) then she proceeded to speak Spanish the entire time even though she speaks perfect English. Only her son’s could understand her and even at their pleading she wouldn’t quit.
Other fun (?) times
She tells, (doesn’t ask) us, to take her husband to the eye doctor which we do because he is nice and we like him. He informs us he hasn’t eaten all day, which we find is the rule rather then the exception so we take him to a restaurant for a bite to eat. She is running late for an appointment (is there a pattern here?) and we see her come storming into the restaurant with a crazed look on her face. Kal takes her gently by the arm to tell her what the eye doctor told him. She whirled around and screamed at the top of her lungs, “You’re hurting me. Take your hands off me.” Of course everyone in the restaurant has turned around and is looking at this. The manager came up and asked if everything was alright or if he needed to call the police. To that, she screamed once again to call the police and have them arrest her son. She then takes her husband’s cane and throws it at him and barks to him to get up and go with her. In the meantime I am going to the kitchen to ask them to make dad’s order to go.
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Random thoughts
I think I'll keep this as an ongoing thing that I can just punch into.
1. If the object of your argument is your MIL and the things she does, is your MIL coming between you? I'd say yes to this one. This past weekend was pretty good except for two arguments and neither of them would have happened if it weren't for his mother. Sunday, we had to sneak off to the early service at church so we wouldn't have to go with Stella but Kal being Kal ended up calling her afterward to go to breakfast with us. No she couldn't just meet us there we had to drive out of our way to pick her up and when the bill came she made no effort whatsoever to pick it up or help us out with the tip. We dropped her off at her house and thought we would have the day to ourselves. Buahh ha ha, what the hell was I thinking? She calls with the, Mijo, take me to Costco B.S. which he does of course. It's her ploy to get him to end up paying for her stuff so I tell Kal to let her pay for her own things and not use the American Express because we need to pay off our credit cards.
Well, I must have been naive to think Kal could go to Costco and not buy anything, it's just impossible, it's not in his DNA makeup. He comes home and told me he put over $200 on the American Express and I hit the ceiling. He gives me this "excuse" that he had to because they wouldn't take his mom's check. Wrong! That's why we got her the membership so they would take her checks. Plus I asked him to not put it on the American Express and he did. He said his mom's portion was $100 which means he spent over $100 on things we couldn't live without, like $65 worth of DVDs. Thus the first argument of the weekend that wouldn't have taken place but did because of her. As I see it, if his mom never called to have him take her to Costco, he wouldn't have gone either and we wouldn't have put $200 on our card.
The second argument happened on Monday evening when, like usual I prepared enough food for three when the phone rings at 6:30 and she says she is going to stay in Los Lunas. I snap at Kal that I am over making, and wasting food for her whims. On one hand I should be happy she didn't come over but on the other hand I'm big on giving notice. If I had known earlier in the day she wasn't going to be there I could have gone through the afternoon happy and peaceful, but no she is always in the back of my head. I finally told Kal that was it, I'm sick of her coming over whenever the hell she wants at whatever time as well. I want a set schedule such as she comes and eats here on Mon., Wed., Fri. nights but we need one full weekend day from awakening to bedtime alone without seeing her at all. Plus, the nights we do ask her over she needs to be here when we eat, I'm tired of her strolling in whenever she wants and expects to be waited on. We eat at 6:30 period, if you aren't here, I guess you miss dinner. I really think I'm being generous with our time but I have yet to see Kal do or say anything to her about it.
Case in point she calls last night about 6:30 inquiring about what's for dinner tonight and what did we have last night blah blah and says to Kal she'll be over to eat. I told Kal, great, I have a few things I want to talk to her about concerning coming over but he told me not to say anything to her, that he would take care of it. I just wonder when this will happen.
Feb 23. OK it has been a week now since Kal told me he would take care of things and nothing yet. I'm still waiting. She still can come over whenever she wants to at night and no consequences. The other day was a crack up when she said since she came over all the time to eat our food she wanted to "pitch in" with some groceries. She brought over a 40 oz jar of ranch dressing and a cantaloupe. I fricken hate cantaloupes.
Geez, Kal told me last night that Tina wanted us to come over for another rosary for Eric and Francine on Thurs. It's less then two weeks since the last one so I graciously said no thank you, not this time. Besides its Survivor night.
This afternoon I asked Kal if his mother was going to go to the rosary and he told me that Eric didn't want her there because of the negative energy she brings. So I'm thinking to myself oh great, Kal is going to Eric's and I'm going to be here when MIL shows up. I guess I have to be honest and tell her that her Mijo is praying. What hypocrites, praying for the good but not everyone is allowed to come.
1. If the object of your argument is your MIL and the things she does, is your MIL coming between you? I'd say yes to this one. This past weekend was pretty good except for two arguments and neither of them would have happened if it weren't for his mother. Sunday, we had to sneak off to the early service at church so we wouldn't have to go with Stella but Kal being Kal ended up calling her afterward to go to breakfast with us. No she couldn't just meet us there we had to drive out of our way to pick her up and when the bill came she made no effort whatsoever to pick it up or help us out with the tip. We dropped her off at her house and thought we would have the day to ourselves. Buahh ha ha, what the hell was I thinking? She calls with the, Mijo, take me to Costco B.S. which he does of course. It's her ploy to get him to end up paying for her stuff so I tell Kal to let her pay for her own things and not use the American Express because we need to pay off our credit cards.
Well, I must have been naive to think Kal could go to Costco and not buy anything, it's just impossible, it's not in his DNA makeup. He comes home and told me he put over $200 on the American Express and I hit the ceiling. He gives me this "excuse" that he had to because they wouldn't take his mom's check. Wrong! That's why we got her the membership so they would take her checks. Plus I asked him to not put it on the American Express and he did. He said his mom's portion was $100 which means he spent over $100 on things we couldn't live without, like $65 worth of DVDs. Thus the first argument of the weekend that wouldn't have taken place but did because of her. As I see it, if his mom never called to have him take her to Costco, he wouldn't have gone either and we wouldn't have put $200 on our card.
The second argument happened on Monday evening when, like usual I prepared enough food for three when the phone rings at 6:30 and she says she is going to stay in Los Lunas. I snap at Kal that I am over making, and wasting food for her whims. On one hand I should be happy she didn't come over but on the other hand I'm big on giving notice. If I had known earlier in the day she wasn't going to be there I could have gone through the afternoon happy and peaceful, but no she is always in the back of my head. I finally told Kal that was it, I'm sick of her coming over whenever the hell she wants at whatever time as well. I want a set schedule such as she comes and eats here on Mon., Wed., Fri. nights but we need one full weekend day from awakening to bedtime alone without seeing her at all. Plus, the nights we do ask her over she needs to be here when we eat, I'm tired of her strolling in whenever she wants and expects to be waited on. We eat at 6:30 period, if you aren't here, I guess you miss dinner. I really think I'm being generous with our time but I have yet to see Kal do or say anything to her about it.
Case in point she calls last night about 6:30 inquiring about what's for dinner tonight and what did we have last night blah blah and says to Kal she'll be over to eat. I told Kal, great, I have a few things I want to talk to her about concerning coming over but he told me not to say anything to her, that he would take care of it. I just wonder when this will happen.
Feb 23. OK it has been a week now since Kal told me he would take care of things and nothing yet. I'm still waiting. She still can come over whenever she wants to at night and no consequences. The other day was a crack up when she said since she came over all the time to eat our food she wanted to "pitch in" with some groceries. She brought over a 40 oz jar of ranch dressing and a cantaloupe. I fricken hate cantaloupes.
Geez, Kal told me last night that Tina wanted us to come over for another rosary for Eric and Francine on Thurs. It's less then two weeks since the last one so I graciously said no thank you, not this time. Besides its Survivor night.
This afternoon I asked Kal if his mother was going to go to the rosary and he told me that Eric didn't want her there because of the negative energy she brings. So I'm thinking to myself oh great, Kal is going to Eric's and I'm going to be here when MIL shows up. I guess I have to be honest and tell her that her Mijo is praying. What hypocrites, praying for the good but not everyone is allowed to come.
Friday, February 12, 2010
Jump! How high?
It's amazing. I can't tell you how much I was really looking forward to having a nice quiet evening ALONE with Kal and watching the season premier of Survivor, H vs V but of course when it comes to this family I am feeling once again what I want really doesn't matter. When it comes to his mother or brother Kal just can't be firm with them and tell them no. I'm not really sure why he wants to please them so much when all they do is take advantage of him.
Case in point 1: Over the holidays when BJ had his little kiosk at the mall to sell his statues and things he asked Kal if he would help him out and had him work three times a week for at least four hours a day without pay. Kal of course did that and told BJ that he would do more if he needed. What does BJ do to show his appreciation, he takes Kal off the schedule once so he could have Francine's best friends son work and he paid him!
Case in point 2: He can't say no to his mother either especially when it comes to dinner in the evening. It's my fault as well because I still always make enough food to feed her but I am really getting over it. It's bad enough when she just comes over whenever she feels like it or calls and asks "what's for dinner." but when we don't hear from her Kal feels the need to call and ask her where she is, did she eat? and to come over. Come on, he thinks she is unable to feed herself and even when she says no (which may be once a month) he pleads for her to come and eat even when we are finished and the kitchen is cleaned up.
Now that Kal is working full time I hardly get the chance to see him so I really don't want to share him every night with his mother. That's why when she left on Wed. night she told us she wouldn't come over on Thurs. because it is my TV night and I was thrilled to have a night alone for a change. The evening started to disintegrate when BJ called about 6:15 and I was listening to Kal talking to him. Some of the things I heard were "sure bro" "we'll be there" "see you tomorrow at 6:30". When I asked Kal where will we be at 6:30 and what day will this happen? He told me that "the family" is going to get together at BJ's house on Friday to have a rosary read to pray for Eric and Francine and all the problems (his embezzlement trial) going on in their lives. Francine's mom Tina is going to lead it and I could go but didn't have to participate in it.
They got that one right. First off I'm not Catholic and I don't understand the rosary, that's going to be my main excuse for not participating. Secondly I think the whole thing of praying for BJ is hypocritical. In my opinion, if he weren't guilty on some level why in the world would you be need to be prayed for? The thing about this whole thing I find astonishing is, if I were accused of embezzling thousands of dollars and I knew I didn't do it I would be shouting it from the tops of the mountains. I would be doing my damnedest to talk to and convince everyone I know, especially those in or related to my family and let them know this couldn't be and isn't possible that I could be guilty of this crime. I have yet to see that from Eric. I hear that he has a lot of evidence he could present against his old boss and the old there are two sides of every story, but not once, not a peep from him saying "I didn't do it." So yes, I do think he is guilty and this praying bull shit just doesn't sit well with me.
So back to the evening; after the prayer announcement I served dinner for Kal and myself thinking I've timed it just right to finish and hunker in to watch Survivor at 7:00. Well, sure as hell at 6:54 the phone rings and it's his mom asking Kal her typical bull shit questions of "did I call at dinner?" "what did Kevin make?" then the "I haven't eaten all day" line. True to form Kal told her to come over but we were watching Survivor. I swear she must have been across the street when she called because the door bell rang less then a minute after they hung up. Thank god for the ability to pause live TV because I had to hit the button while the queen entered and do her phony bologna high pitched greeting to the dogs in spanish. She gets her food then starts in about the parents at her school, the administration and someone said this about that and the woman who helped her secure a position at the school has an inferiority complex, blah blah. All the while she is talking it is in that tone of voice that is so condescending and ugly it just sends chills up my spine. I'm thinking the whole time that I'm sure this is the same tone of voice she is using at her school. I can't help but think she used the same tone of voice and the same anger in the other three schools she was "let go" (think; fired) from in the past five years. If I was in a position of authority and she talked to my in that ugly way I would fire her. So after this little tirade she asks us if we are going to Eric's tomorrow for the prayer meeting. Kal told her it was a rosery and he was planning on going and he didn't know if I was going so then she perks up all happy, "oh I'll ride with you mijo."
So after pausing my show for about 25 minutes I was able to start watching but had to keep pausing when she was talking or going into the kitchen before finally leaving. So my night didn't happen, my night never happens. Now it is about 4:15 on Friday, 2 hours and 15 minutes until prayer central takes place, I can't wait. Woo fucking hoo!
Case in point 1: Over the holidays when BJ had his little kiosk at the mall to sell his statues and things he asked Kal if he would help him out and had him work three times a week for at least four hours a day without pay. Kal of course did that and told BJ that he would do more if he needed. What does BJ do to show his appreciation, he takes Kal off the schedule once so he could have Francine's best friends son work and he paid him!
Case in point 2: He can't say no to his mother either especially when it comes to dinner in the evening. It's my fault as well because I still always make enough food to feed her but I am really getting over it. It's bad enough when she just comes over whenever she feels like it or calls and asks "what's for dinner." but when we don't hear from her Kal feels the need to call and ask her where she is, did she eat? and to come over. Come on, he thinks she is unable to feed herself and even when she says no (which may be once a month) he pleads for her to come and eat even when we are finished and the kitchen is cleaned up.
Now that Kal is working full time I hardly get the chance to see him so I really don't want to share him every night with his mother. That's why when she left on Wed. night she told us she wouldn't come over on Thurs. because it is my TV night and I was thrilled to have a night alone for a change. The evening started to disintegrate when BJ called about 6:15 and I was listening to Kal talking to him. Some of the things I heard were "sure bro" "we'll be there" "see you tomorrow at 6:30". When I asked Kal where will we be at 6:30 and what day will this happen? He told me that "the family" is going to get together at BJ's house on Friday to have a rosary read to pray for Eric and Francine and all the problems (his embezzlement trial) going on in their lives. Francine's mom Tina is going to lead it and I could go but didn't have to participate in it.
They got that one right. First off I'm not Catholic and I don't understand the rosary, that's going to be my main excuse for not participating. Secondly I think the whole thing of praying for BJ is hypocritical. In my opinion, if he weren't guilty on some level why in the world would you be need to be prayed for? The thing about this whole thing I find astonishing is, if I were accused of embezzling thousands of dollars and I knew I didn't do it I would be shouting it from the tops of the mountains. I would be doing my damnedest to talk to and convince everyone I know, especially those in or related to my family and let them know this couldn't be and isn't possible that I could be guilty of this crime. I have yet to see that from Eric. I hear that he has a lot of evidence he could present against his old boss and the old there are two sides of every story, but not once, not a peep from him saying "I didn't do it." So yes, I do think he is guilty and this praying bull shit just doesn't sit well with me.
So back to the evening; after the prayer announcement I served dinner for Kal and myself thinking I've timed it just right to finish and hunker in to watch Survivor at 7:00. Well, sure as hell at 6:54 the phone rings and it's his mom asking Kal her typical bull shit questions of "did I call at dinner?" "what did Kevin make?" then the "I haven't eaten all day" line. True to form Kal told her to come over but we were watching Survivor. I swear she must have been across the street when she called because the door bell rang less then a minute after they hung up. Thank god for the ability to pause live TV because I had to hit the button while the queen entered and do her phony bologna high pitched greeting to the dogs in spanish. She gets her food then starts in about the parents at her school, the administration and someone said this about that and the woman who helped her secure a position at the school has an inferiority complex, blah blah. All the while she is talking it is in that tone of voice that is so condescending and ugly it just sends chills up my spine. I'm thinking the whole time that I'm sure this is the same tone of voice she is using at her school. I can't help but think she used the same tone of voice and the same anger in the other three schools she was "let go" (think; fired) from in the past five years. If I was in a position of authority and she talked to my in that ugly way I would fire her. So after this little tirade she asks us if we are going to Eric's tomorrow for the prayer meeting. Kal told her it was a rosery and he was planning on going and he didn't know if I was going so then she perks up all happy, "oh I'll ride with you mijo."
So after pausing my show for about 25 minutes I was able to start watching but had to keep pausing when she was talking or going into the kitchen before finally leaving. So my night didn't happen, my night never happens. Now it is about 4:15 on Friday, 2 hours and 15 minutes until prayer central takes place, I can't wait. Woo fucking hoo!
Thursday, February 4, 2010
My Dogs
After reading back on some of the things I've written it seems like the only thing I'm pretty good at is bitching. Granted there is a lot to bitch about with this group of characters I've been surrounded with so today I'm switching gears and going to write about something I love which are my dogs. I don't think I've ever had a period in my life when I didn't have dogs except for college and maybe the first year or so after I graduated. There was Pooh, a Chihuahua, when I was born but I don't remember him. Next we had Marty (the first of many many Westies) we got when I was 3 and she was the mother of Duffy who was born when I was 5. Those were my "growing up" dogs because Marty lived to be 13 and Duffy was 17 when dad killed him. OK he really didn't kill him but poor ol Duffers had gone outside without my dad noticing and when he came back in and closed the garage, the door caught Duffy in the middle of his back and broke it killing him right away. That was in the day before the sensors that made the door go back up if something crossed it. A couple of years before Duffy died my parents got Sheona for Wendy's birthday and they had her for many years and when I came home from college she was there.
As I said right after college when I lived in my little apartment in Denver and worked for Frontier I didn't have a dog. After I met and moved in with Walt, Klancy came into my life. Klancy was Walt's dog and he was 1/2 shepard and 1/2 sheepdog and 100 percent wonderful. He was the sweetest dog I had ever met and loved him very much and he was very smart too. After we moved to Fort Collins we found another shepard, sheepdog (sheepshep) in Windsor and we got the first dog I called "mine", Cory. Cory and Klancy got along great and the two of them were a great pair. Cory was so faithful to me and I adored her.
Klancy was getting pretty old for a big dog, I think he was 11 or 12 and his hips were getting bad causing him to fall and it was a struggle for him to get up. It was right about this same time when I noticed a rough lump on Cory's leg and took her into the vet to see what was the problem. They took a biopsy and found she had a very rare form of melanoma which was unusual for dogs to have and the vets recommended I go to Colorado State University's vet hospital for treatment. Luckily I lived in Fort Collins where the hospital was so it wasn't a hardship for me to take her there. They told me her cancer was terminal but there was a new treatment from New York they could offer to do if I wanted. The only hitch is they wanted to do an autopsy when she died whether it be a month from then or 4 years which I agreed. I also had to leave her for a weekend once a month for them to observe and I also said that would be alright. By Feb. 94 Klancy was falling and we would find him sprawled out on his belly with his legs off to the side and because his hips were so bad he couldn't get up. Who knew how many hours this poor dog was like that so Walt took him in to have him put to sleep. At the time I didn't understand really what it was to put a dog to sleep because I never had to go through that before. I got home from work and Walt told me he just dropped him off at the vet and left him because he couldn't see Klancy convulse, shake and lose all bowel and urinary control. After Klancy was gone, I think it affected Cory a lot and her tumors started to spread and grow on her leg and under her belly. We were house sitting my parents house and when I came home from lunch one day her tumors had broken and there was blood everywhere. I called the Dr. who was treating her cancer and we agreed to meet at the hospital to have her put down. The Dr. and tech met us outside and took us through a side door to a room set up with dim lighting and a pad where we took time to calm her down before she got the shot. They asked me if I wanted to be with her and I told her what Walt told me about the process. They assured me it was nothing like that so I decided to be with her even though Walt had to leave the room. It was so peaceful and nice for her and I was so touched when the Dr. started to cry with me as well. I was so thankful I was with Cory and couldn't understand why Walt couldn't be with Klancy and why he didn't ask me to be there either. It still makes me sad to think about poor sweet Klancy being left alone for his last minutes. It was only two weeks from the day after losing Klancy that Cory went to join him. It was a very sad and dreary winter and I cried a lot.
That summer we got a full breed Sheepdog, Roscoe, even though he didn't have papers, in Denver. He was a funny dog and very hyper and he loved to bounce around. My mom would scratch his behind and he just wiggled and wiggled around loving her long nails. He was a good dog but he was really Walt's dog. The next summer my friend Chris told us one of her co-workers Golden Retrievers had puppies and wanted to know if we wanted to "go look" at them. Well, as expected I found a sweet heart of a puppy there and put a deposit down on Mason who got his name from the people I bought him from because that was their last name. Mason was so smart he didn't really need much training. I always said he was an old soul even when he was a puppy because he was so mellow and sweet.
By the end of 1997 it was the beginning of the end for Walt and me (another blog) even though we didn't officially split until Nov. 98. When the split finally did come it was clear the dogs were going to be separated along with the two of us. I knew Walt was going to take Roscoe and I was taking Mason just like he was going to take the wing back chair and I was taking the couch. After I moved into my own house I knew Mason was grieving his loss of Roscoe because he was just so down. Here he was in a new house with just me, it must have been really hard on him but thank God for Mason because if it weren't for him I don't think I would have been able to get through this split without him. Some of the best times I had with Mason were when we would go to my parent's house and go swimming. I would take a tennis ball and throw it out in the water and he would jump in and swim out time and time again to get it. I'd jump in the water and the two of us would just swim around playing ball. It really was like living in the lazy hazy days of summer.
Little did I know during that this was going to be the beginning of the worst time of my life which I know I'll cover later.
Fast forward to Mar. 2000 when my mom went into the hospital for her heart surgery and she had me take care of her Westie, Murphy. I had taken care of Murphy many times before when my parents would go to La Jolla for the winter and absolutely loved her and she and Mason were great buddies. On Mar. 29, both Murphy and I became orphans when mom died just ten months after dad passed away. There was no question that Murphy was going to live with Mason and me and I know she had a great life with us. That summer I would sit on my deck and watch Murphy and Mason run from one side of the yard to the other to look out the fence to see the goings on in the street. It wasn't long before I had my little Westie paths in my yard and realized I'd never have grass grow there ever again. The three of us would have our little routines starting in the morning when I would have them jump up on the bed for our morning snuggles. Mason would sleep on the floor and Murphy had her own bed so the morning times were special. I didn't live too far from a park so the three of us would go on our evening walks mostly in the summer and I would take them to the ranch sometimes.
Then came New Years Eve, 00-01 when I met Kal at a party in Denver. To say we hit it off quickly is an understatement but the biggest hurdle was that Kal and the dogs had to get along, not only get along they all had to thrive. If Kal wasn't coming up to Fort Collins I was loading up the dogs into my truck to drive down to Albuquerque. I usually stopped in Pueblo, Las Vegas and this gas stop in Budaghers, NM to let the dogs out to go "pee pee caa caa." We'd get here but unfortunately the house Kal was renting had a horrible back yard and the poor dogs hated to go outside there. When I went back to Fort Collins I usually would hit Denver at rush hour. It was so cute when the dogs looked out the window in the back of the truck at the people sitting stuck in traffic. I know they were responsible for a lot of smiles those people might not have had at that moment.
Well, the three of them did hit it off and when it was clear I was going to move to Albuquerque I decided to leave the dogs with Kal while I packed up my house. Murphy was at mom's when we went through her things and she really was visibly upset about everything getting packed up and I didn't want her to go through that again. It was easier for me to not have them there but it sure was lonely at night. While the dogs were with Kal he had a doggie door put in the rental house and set about cleaning up the yard as best as he could.
I got moved into the rental and we started looking for a house to buy. One of the many criteria we needed in a house was a yard for the dogs. We found the house on Coe and put in an offer that was accepted. We closed on the house the first week of Sept. 01 and took Murphy and Mason on the AIDS Walk with us on Sept. 8. Someone was there with a little Westie and told us there was an ad in the paper for Westie puppies for sale in Tome. Well, the terrierists hit Albuquerque 2 days before New York and Washington when we bought Maggie on 9-9-01. Maggie was a little puppy and had the biggest ears on her. Of course Mason was a perfect gentleman with letting Maggie grab on to his ears becoming living earrings. Murphy wasn't too sure of her but was never mean to her and after awhile the girls were playing with each other and our little family became five.
When we moved into the house we had the doggie door installed and a fenced grass yard for the babies. I am so glad we didn't remodel the kitchen for a couple of years because Maggie took it upon herself to be the personal destruction dog. She chewed up the cabinets and ripped up the vinyl floor in the laundry room. The three of them quickly became a team and poor old Mason had to deal with them. They would cuddle up in Masons legs and sleep that way. We had our portrait taken with Murphy, Mason and Maggie that also became our Christmas card and is hanging in the family room.
Murphy had been diagnosed with a form of cancer in early 02 but it really didn't seem to slow her down. When we decided to to the AIDS walk that fall we thought we could take turns carrying Murphy but she wouldn't have it and walked the whole 5K. The only real things we saw about her illness was she wasn't eating very much and was starting to get pretty thin. Then there was that night in Dec. when we were getting ready for bed and couldn't find Murphers. We looked all around the house and went out front thinking she might have slipped out when we turned of the Christmas lights but couldn't find her anywhere. I was frantic and running all over the place when I decided to go out and really check out the dog yard. It was cold and drizzling outside and I looked down by the wheel barrel and saw her two little hind legs sticking out from behind it. I picked her up and she was dirty, wet, shaking and wheezing. I brought her in and dried her off and tried to put her to bed. She was up most of the night not doing well and I was awake most of the night listening to her. The next morning she couldn't even stand up on her own so we called the vet and they got us in right away. It was pretty clear to us that Murphy went out under the wheel barrel to die. I don't think she wanted us to see her go and this was her way to spare us. I didn't want her to suffer anymore and knew it was time to let her go so while I held her in my arms I had the vets give her the shot to put her to sleep. Like Cory many years ago it was so peaceful for her and I was so glad I was with her. Not only was it hard to lose Murphy but I felt another piece of mom being torn away from me. While I had Murphy, I still had my mom in a way. I would always refer to her as my mom's dog and we had that special bond.
I couldn't believe it but in the next day's paper was an ad for Westie puppies from the same place we got Maggie. I didn't want to get another puppy so soon after losing Murphy, it had only been one day for crying out loud but decided to go "look" at the puppies. They had two girls left and brought one out first. She was cute but a little shy and I thought to myself we could leave and not feel badly about not getting one. Then they brought out the other little girl. This little puppy was the cutest thing I had ever seen with her fluffy hair and her ears still weren't up. To say we had a mutual admiration for each other would be an understatement my heart just melted when I held her. So off we went home with little Miss Molly, by golly in arm. Kal kept telling me that there was a part of my mom in Molly and that she in fact picked me, which I guess is right.
We got Molly home and she fit in quickly. Maggie was glad to have someone to play with and Mason being Mason put up with her. We got Molly into school quickly and being the proud papas that we are took the video camera to all the school functions. Of course Molly was the best in class but I have to admit that I didn't keep up with her schooling because not only did Miss Molly pick me out she was training me as well. Before I knew it, Mollers took on the role of "alpha dog" which she wore well. She let us know that she was "over" sleeping in the kennel and was ready to sleep on the bed and quickly let us know that she was letting us sleep on the bed with her. She is the only dog I know that loves to burrow to the bottom of the bed and sleep under the covers even in the middle of summer.
I love Molly with my heart but she has this separation anxiety issue with me. When I drove up to the cabin with just the dogs I couldn't even stop to go to the bathroom without her wailing in the truck. It is the same thing at the groomers. For the first few time I took her to get groomed they suggested I might give her some doggie downers to calm her down. Then there is the mailman, good lord I swear she can hear his truck two blocks away and she just sits there staring at the mail slot whining. I have had to put up a barricade so she can't grab the mail when it comes through the slot or else it gets shredded better then my paper shredder.
I have to say though I have never had a dog that loves me as much as Molly does and the feeling is mutual. I have and do love all the dogs I have had in my life but there is something about Molly that's different. Maybe it is the way she has to be with me all the time or at least in lines sight or how she snuggles on my lap but I absolutely adore her. She has the best personality too and I swear she knows how to talk when she does the "wouh wouh wouh". She can jump like I have never seen with all four legs off the floor at least a foot high, especially when it is treat time at 5:30. Mollers watches TV too and whenever a dog, not a cat, is on the screen she flies off the couch to run up to the TV to jump and bark at the dog on the screen. When she hurt her back and had to be on pain killers I just hated seeing her drugged up. She would sleep through the night and was calm as can be. I missed my jumping barking bed hogging Mollers.
By 2008, 'ol Masaroonie was starting to feel his age. Golden Retrievers hips tend to get bad when they get older and because Mason was such a big dog it was getting to him. We had him on Rymadel to loosen up his hips a bit but had to help him out by putting rug runners on the hard wood floors because he would slip on them and fall. Bless his heart though he loved his meals and treats and even though he was a little overweight I didn't deny him his goodies. One of the dogs most favorite things was to go to our neighbor Margaret's house (auntie Margaret) for treats. Margaret lives three doors down and when we let them out all three of them would tear over there. We would sit around the table and auntie Margaret would open up a bag of treats and divey them out between the puppies.
One day in Jan. we got the call to come over to auntie Margaret's house and let the dogs out like we had done so many times except this time about half the way over, Mason fell and he fell hard. He was down and when we got to him he was gasping for air. We got him up slowly, walked him home and called the vet who told us they could take him in right away. They could tell from looking at him and checking him over that his larynx was collapsing. We were informed there were no pills to help and the only thing that could help him was surgery. Even if we went that route they told us sometimes dogs forget how to swallow and have been known to chock themselves to death. Mason was at the point too that by doing nothing he could die a very painful death by not breathing and I knew I couldn't do that to him. Our vets are so wonderful, they gave Mason a sedative to relax him so his breathing will be easier and they told us we could take him home to spend his last day around familiar surroundings and they would come over after work to put him to sleep. I couldn't leave his side all day, it just broke my heart to think of losing my best friend.
Mason was with me always by my side through my breakup and moving into our own house. He comforted me through my dad's bout with cancer and his passing away and then again ten months later with losing my mom. There were so many times when I would just sit on the kitchen floor wailing away with Mason sitting next to me letting me hold him. I'm so glad the last years of Mason's life were so happy living here with Kal, Maggie and Molly. Before the vets got to the house we gave Mason a whole bags of treats which he loved. They arrived and we put the girls in the bedroom and once again I lay next to Mason as he went to join Murphy and Cory in a very quiet peaceful passing. I'm sitting here crying thinking about my wonderful boy. I miss him so much.
After losing Mason I really didn't want to get another dog at least right away so we just concentrated on Maggie and Molly until September came along. Kal saw an ad in the paper from the same breeder we got our other two Westies about a little girl needing a lap to curl up on. Kal was working but I went down to Tome to "look" at her like so many other puppies in the past. I was good and took a critical look at her and told the woman to hold her at least a day and I'd let her know by the next day. After talking to Kal that night I called and told her I'd be there the next day to pick up Masey. Yes we already had a name for her. We named her after Mason and as it has turned out we think there is some of my big fella in this little piece of work.
So I picked up Masey in the morning and met Kal at lunch with her and we all went to the park. Of course he fell in love with her too and all the girls got along. Molly and Masey had a ball playing together and still do to this day. I feel bad for Maggers that she gets left out of their romping but I think since she is getting a little older the wild play isn't as much fun for her. Just like the other two, Masey didn't have much kennel time and before we knew it she was sleeping on the bed with us, or should I say me. Unlike Molly, Masey sleeps on my side toward the bottom of the bed and she stays there all night long for the most part.
As it has turned out we are so happy we got little Masers. Not only is she as cute as can be, we wonder how a heart as big as hers can fit into that little body. She has an amazing capability to go with either of us when she realizes one of us is alone unlike Miss Mollers who has to be with me all the time. She learned how to "sit pretty" by herself and we will look at her sitting up and can't help but scoop her up in our arms. Now she has taken to keeping one of our socks with her all the time. She will hunt for her sockers and come in the room with it in her mouth. Masey doesn't rip it apart she just wants to have it either in her mouth or under her chin.
All in all I have been very lucky with my puppies through the years. Each and every one of them has or had their own personalities and have always offered their unconditional love. I couldn't imagine my life without dogs and have been blessed that these wonderful creatures came into my life. Kal said something the other night that really warmed my heart. We were talking about the dogs and how sweet they are and he told me they were so sweet because they learned it from me and that dogs learn their behaviors from their surroundings and the people there. Thanks sweetie.
Whew, done for now :)
Monday, February 1, 2010
Beemer----again
I'm getting sick of MIL's problems she always continues to have and it is always up to us to fix it. I keep asking Kal why is it ALWAYS when she has a problem it ALWAYS becomes our emergency. That old BMW of hers is nothing but a money pit. It doesn't have to be but since she doesn't take care of it the car has nothing to do but fall apart. I don't know how many months we have told her when she leaves the house she also leaves a puddle in the driveway from her car. Does she do anything about it when the problem is new and can be fixed pretty easy? Noooo.... she has to wait until the car can barely be driven. Now all of a sudden the radiator is shot and isn't holding liquid and she can't drive it so who does she come to? Yeah, us and as always Kal ends up giving her the Jeep. My fear of fears is that she will get into an accident with the Jeep and because of it's age we will end up having to go further into debt to get another vehicle and she won't offer up a dime. I can even bet right here and now she wouldn't even pay the deductible. It will somehow be our fault.
Of course when shit like this happens Baby Jesus won't help out at all. It's basically just fuck off and he doesn't care one way or another about his mom or us for that matter. He and Francine are very selfish and couldn't be counted on to help us for anything as far as I'm concerned.
A few months ago it was the same thing about her car when it was having problems and had to go to the shop. It was about $400 to fix it and of course MIL told us she didn't have the money and her credit cards were maxed out. Does baby Jesus volunteer to help pay this bill, fuck no, so we ended up paying for it and as expected there has been no mention or effort to pay us back for it. What was our option? Don't pay for it and let her use the Jeep and run it into the ground? Let her walk? Once again, MIL wins we lose as it has been for the last nine years and there is no way I can think of that this will ever change. As my dad would say about people and I'll apply it to MIL is; I pity her because she is so pitiful.
So now back to the Beemer and the radiator. Not only does MIL know everything about the school systems, finances or whatever she now is an expert on car problems. I got roped into being the one to call to take / pick up or whatever needs to be done because Kal is working and needs to take the Jeep to work. I got a message on the phone this morning at 8:15 and she says the mechanic told her the radiator is plastic and will need to be replaced at around $200. Her message to me is she told the mechanic the radiator is metal and that she will find someplace else to take it followed by the pitiful, "what do you think Kevin?" Knowing better then to fall into this pit I called back and left a message that I don't know that much about cars so I am not the person to ask about repairs. I may have been born at night (not really) but I wasn't born last night. So now I am waiting for the next phase on the ongoing Beemer saga.
Of course when shit like this happens Baby Jesus won't help out at all. It's basically just fuck off and he doesn't care one way or another about his mom or us for that matter. He and Francine are very selfish and couldn't be counted on to help us for anything as far as I'm concerned.
A few months ago it was the same thing about her car when it was having problems and had to go to the shop. It was about $400 to fix it and of course MIL told us she didn't have the money and her credit cards were maxed out. Does baby Jesus volunteer to help pay this bill, fuck no, so we ended up paying for it and as expected there has been no mention or effort to pay us back for it. What was our option? Don't pay for it and let her use the Jeep and run it into the ground? Let her walk? Once again, MIL wins we lose as it has been for the last nine years and there is no way I can think of that this will ever change. As my dad would say about people and I'll apply it to MIL is; I pity her because she is so pitiful.
So now back to the Beemer and the radiator. Not only does MIL know everything about the school systems, finances or whatever she now is an expert on car problems. I got roped into being the one to call to take / pick up or whatever needs to be done because Kal is working and needs to take the Jeep to work. I got a message on the phone this morning at 8:15 and she says the mechanic told her the radiator is plastic and will need to be replaced at around $200. Her message to me is she told the mechanic the radiator is metal and that she will find someplace else to take it followed by the pitiful, "what do you think Kevin?" Knowing better then to fall into this pit I called back and left a message that I don't know that much about cars so I am not the person to ask about repairs. I may have been born at night (not really) but I wasn't born last night. So now I am waiting for the next phase on the ongoing Beemer saga.
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